5.08.2011

How Today Was Supposed to Go

I would have been exactly 12 weeks pregnant today.  I thought how great it was going to be to finally be happy about Mother's Day and to have my own reason to celebrate.  I was looking forward to announcing that we were going to have a baby and also share the news about our prior losses more openly.  All the dates seemed to be perfect this time around - my cycle started the day after attending the concert of my favorite band, our IUI happened on the anniversary of the day we met, 12 weeks would fall right on mother's day, our baby would be due in November adding another possible Scorpio to the mix of other important Scorpios/November births I have in my life including my husband, my mother and my grandmother, and there was a slight possibly our little one (which we now know was a girl from the genetic test results) could have been born on 11-11-11 if she decided to make an early appearance.  I wish today was different.  Instead we lost our baby girl and shared the news of our multiple losses during NIAW and today I am just feeling sad and conflicted about what to do next.
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5 comments:

  1. AnonymousMay 8, 2011 at 3:18 PM

    I just realized (I knew this before but forgot) that we were days apart in our pregnancies. I would have been 12w3d along. I'm still waiting for my genetic results to come back. It's a somber day today.

    Whatever decision you make with what direction to go I'll be wishing you the best :)

    I totally hijacked this off Grey's Anatomy today but I feel like I gotta share it with everyone:

    Just when we think we figured things out, the universe throws us a curveball. So, we have to improvise. We find happiness in unexpected places. We find ourselves back to the things that matter the most. The universe is funny that way. Sometimes it just has a way of making sure we wind up exactly where we belong.


    PS
    Thank you so much for my first award :)

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  2. MarissaMay 8, 2011 at 6:24 PM

    Right there with you.

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  3. CyndiMay 10, 2011 at 12:39 AM

    :-( I'm sorry hun.

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  4. AnonymousMay 22, 2011 at 12:55 AM

    Just thinking about you...hope you are doing okay and have been feeling better since this last post.

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  5. CyndiMay 23, 2011 at 12:13 AM

    Hey - hope you're doing alright.

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